An Immodest Proposal

Officials in Chicago are considering set-asides for homosexuals and the "transgendered" in the awarding of city contracts. Chicago already sets aside defined percentages of contracts for businesses owned by minorities and women, and this expensive, corruption-ridden process is one way that the city keeps the wheels turning on its ever-humming patronage machine.

(Word is that the president has put forward something similar in his Obamacare proposal; that'll really keep costs down!)

Let's see: If Chicago gives preference in city contracts to blacks, Latinos, other minorities, women, gays, and the "transgendered," who's still left out? The only group I can think of is straight white males.

Since homosexuality is well on its way to becoming a protected class via hate-crimes legislation and gay marriage, some enterprising white male business owners might simply decide to claim that they're gay in order to get a city contract. And who's going to check, after all? Talk about government intruding into the bedroom!

And under this system of preferences, is an African-American lesbian worth more points than a gay white male? And do you only get half-credit if you're bisexual? And how do you calculate the score for the underrepresented class of people who enjoy sex with farm animals?

Perhaps in a few years we pasty white guys will simply be able to claim reverse discrimination and get some set-asides for ourselves. Then Chicago can scrap the entire program and do something really progressive-just award contracts to the lowest bidders.